Please *don't* Hold the Door

I've been recently frustrated by the over-exuberance that people have in regards to holding doors open for other people. If the door has time to close before I get there, please don't stand there and hold it open... then I'll feel like I have to rush- and I don't like to rush.

In one of my underground tunnel passages yesterday at work, one guy even went back to the door to open it for me because I had a couple things in my hands. His arms were equally laden with things and it would have been easier to just open the door myself because the things that I was carrying were easier to juggle... it was a bit awkward.

I think the worst part is feeling like I have to stand there and hold the door for others when it is totally unnecessary. So I want to ask, when does it end? If the timing is perfect, then great... but the rest of the time I feel the burden of this unrealistic expectation to wait around for people to get to the door so that another can let go.

My friend Shruti says that if she's in a hurry she just proceeds and doesn't look back, but if she's got time, she'll stand there and hold a door. That makes sense, but the only time I've got the leisure to do that is going from my coffee break back to the lab. On every other occasion, I'm on a mission to get something done.

It's one thing if you're with a group of people traveling together, or if you see someone pushing a heavy cart or a stroller and you want to be helpful. The only time I expect for doors to be held for me is when I'm on a date, any other time, I do not expect it. So if you see me not standing around holding a door for someone 20 feet away, please don't be offended.

Jam Pump It Up!

This week is going to be nuts! I'm going to crank out some serious experiments and pray that they work. I won't know if they work for about 2-3 weeks because TB grows so slowly, but at least I'll have a good start.

I'm excited to really "finish" this project so that we can publish my data. I'm somewhere in between really-close and not-so-close depending on what the results to the experiments are, so wish me luck. I'd really like to start writing a paper soon...

On top of all of that, I'm going to try to hit the gym every day this week. I've been stretching my foot so I'm hoping it won't hurt so much. We'll see...

Talk Titles

OK, so, I just got an e-mail reminding me that I'm presenting at this month's IIDC seminar. This basically includes everyone who works on my floor in the LRB at UMass Med and a couple of miscellaneous participants. This seminar is particularly good because the people who will be there will actually understand my research, they'll have valuable input for project directions AND they serve cheese and fruit and beer to keep everyone occupied from 3:30 to 5pm.

Anywhoo, the point is, I had to provide a title for the talk that I am going to give. I hate titles that are basically run-on sentences that spill the beans before you even get there. I try to be creative.

Previous seminar titles of mine have been:
"TB murder by Host Cell Suicide"
"M.tb's Prime Time before Execution" -- this one was around Halloween and I found a vintage Italian propaganda poster picturing the Grim Reaper that warned people about the dangers of tuberculosis-- awesome!

I submitted two titles this time in case the first isn't adequate.
"Cell Death Rescue Mission Leaves Two Dead"
(the "Two" referring to M.tb and the infected cell... genious!!
The more dull alternative is "M. tuberculosis and Macrophages"... I'm hoping the guy in charge will choose the first one. However, I have learned that all I have to do to get people to show up to my talks is to put "M. tuberculosis" in the title. It's really amazing...

My Online Dating Experience:

Ok, so basically all of my friends are married… most of them are having kids… and sometimes I feel a bit left out and several have said, “Why don’t you try online? I know lots of people who meet that way these days.” So, I gave it a shot. This is what happened in chronological order.

#1- Mr. Know-it-All: everything that we talked about and every topic that came up, he’d been-there and done-that. I thought to myself “well, you’re ready to die then because there is clearly nothing left in life to experience”. First date we went to lunch and had some good conversation but I left thinking “whatever”. Second date we went to dinner and he brought me a single red rose (gag) but otherwise went ok. I’m really not into roses. Especially red ones… on a second date with a guy you don’t really know. Daisy’s or something would have been ok. Third date, a hockey game (he used to play) and that’s when his “know-it-all” really started to bother me (although it did bother me previously, not as much as that night). Other than that, he was nice, but we didn’t have any chemistry and I didn’t think he was all that cute.

#2- Mr. Creepy: First of all, he was really awkward or just creepy… I couldn’t tell the difference. He basically had me trapped in a booth at Panera so that I couldn’t move an inch without coming into contact with him and that grossed me out. Second of all, on paper he had it all together, but then he said he really doesn’t like engineering and would like to be a “public servant” (AKA- politician) but I really don’t think he’s smart enough for that. Then he grilled me about what I wanted to do when I was done with my PhD (as if he had any clue)… he thought I had 2 choices: academics or industry. I acted clearly ticked off that he had the audacity to assume he knew anything. To get out of there I said that I really had to get back to lab (at 9pm) and that all I ever do is work and I really don’t have time for anyone (not true- I have time for the right guy just not creeps like him).

#3- Mr. Napoleon Complex: I didn’t actually go out with this guy because after talking to him on the phone, I couldn’t bring myself to even meet him for a beer. He was short, which is fine, but he talked like he had a lot to make up for. Even his voice sounded short… I couldn’t do it

#4- Mr. Philosophy: Those that know me well know that I do not intellectualize everything. I don’t enjoy philosophical discussions (except on the topic of microbial genetics) and I really don’t like turning everything into a mind game. This guy was horrendous. At first he was ok… then, on the second date, he clearly felt more comfortable to be himself and it was all-downhill from there.

Second date: First, I missed the exit off the highway so I called him to say I was going to be late. He wasn’t concerned but asked if I would mind driving. Wow- tacky!! I picked him up and his wardrobe was as follows: old-man jeans (yuk), blue button-down shirt (ok), disgusting worn-out bright yellow sneakers (double yuk), brown corduroy jacket (maybe with better jeans) and a green ball-cap. Outfit was strike two. Strike three- the most disgusting cheap $4 “brunch” at a diner. Strike four- the non-stop everything-is-philosophical conversation. I wanted to stick my fork in my eye. I had wasted half of a gorgeous weekend on this lousy “date”.

#5- Mr. Pharmacy Grad-Student: He’s working on his PharmD locally seems fun and active and nice to be around. Like me, he’s the oldest of 4 siblings and just seems really down to earth. He’s tall and handsome with blue eyes too so that’s never bad right? WRONG! Turns out he just wants someone to "work out" with if you know what I mean. On date #2, he kissed me and it was bar-none the worst kissing experience of my life. I didn't know anyone could kiss that badly!! Not to mention, it was only date #2 when I just met the guy!?!?! I had to push him away... Not my style AT ALL!!

I have removed my profile from Match.com. After #4 I went on a rant about how much I am SO over dating and that I'd rather be single than go out with another frog. #5 confirmed it. I'm pretty happy with where my life is and where it's going right now, it's just not worth the energy.

Friday

So, last night I checked the weather before going to bed and found out that we were execting an ice storm this morning during the commute to work. I took the liberty of not setting my alarm since I didn't have to be at work until 5pm when my time point was, so that I could sleep through the storm and safely make it to work. I woke up at about 8:30 and there was no ice. But, this week I'm putting in about 80 hours in the lab so the fact that I had a slow day meant that I seriously needed to take advantage of it and catch up on some sleep. I made myself some blueberry pancakes for breakfast, took a long shower, took care of the kitty's that I'm babysitting for the week and then went to my apartment to pick up some clothes to last me until Tuesday. Picking up clothes would have been quick except that I have a date on Sunday so of course I had to make sure that outfit was perfect. I had to run to the store to pick up some stockings and then by 3pm I made it into work. Normally I would feel guilty about this but when I got to work a friend of mine said "why don't you just take the whole day off?" I no longer felt the guilt. After all, I'll be here most of Saturday.

Emergency Broadcast System

rrrrrrrrrrr....rrrrrrrrrrrrrr....rrrrrrrrrrrr "this is a test of the emergency broadcast system, this is only a test" rrrrrrrrrrr....rrrrrrrrrr.....rrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

OK, so, for the FIRST TIME EVER, I heard this for REAL, and it was NOT a test!!! Can you believe it! They actually use these! I heard the warning "rrrrrrrrrr'S" and changed the channel thinking "I hate it when they interrupt a perfectly good song on the radio to do a test". But I changed back to see if it was over and they were actually giving out directions about the up-coming gigantic storm that hit us this past night. Unbelievable. It was cool... they were saying things like "drive slowly" and "15 inches of snow expected in the Worcester area" and "driving conditions will be bad".

We did get a lot of snow. This morning I shoveled the entire driveway and half the street (that didn't get plowed thanks to my roomate who parked on the street instead of the driveway). There was at least a foot of snow at 7am and it's still snowing out there.

I am, of course, at work. It is Monday and snow storm or not, I work on Monday's. I actually might have stayed home and worked there but I had an important time point for an experiment that I started early last week and today is the last day of the experiment. Not coming today was not an option... although the place is a total ghost town right now.

Bowling

Today I volunteered at the Special Olympics here in Worcester. I was stationed at the bowling alley with about 8 other UMassers. We showed up at 8:30 and left at 1:30. We were there to make sure that the kids that were bowling matched the name on the screen and to cheer them on. The girls were first. They were timid but excited. I think that we were with the kids in lanes that had “less” of a disability than other kids and they were all about middle school age. The girls were bowling ~120 and the boys were ~160 which is pretty unbelievable. And on top of all that, they were super happy kids… you could tell that it wasn’t just the excitement of the day but that they really had some pretty sweet dispositions. It was grand.

I really wondered what kind of a difference we were making. It seemed that parent’s and “friends” of these kids were more in the back seat and cheering compared to us who showed up for a day and then left as soon as it was over to come back to the lab to get a few things done. No doubt that they needed people to watch the bowlers, but there were probably twice as many volunteers as needed. People would say “thanks for volunteering” and I found myself thinking “Are you serious? You do this every day!” It’s easy to show up to a charity event, it’s another to life your life for others as so many do.